aimeelicious | Grace, chapter 13 (fic post)

I know, some of you fell off your chairs when you read the subject line. But I never intended to give up on this fic, I just had RL issues over the summer and then, well, I couldn't seem to get past this chapter. I've rewritten it a bunch of times, tweaked it, thesaurased it, researched it by reading bad gay erotica, avoided it, and then avoided it some more. But I saw

entrenous88 a few days ago and she gave me some good advice; just post it and move on. I already have chapters 14 & 15 written, hopefully they'll be up over the weekend. In the meantime, this chapter is purely smut, and not very good smut at that but I've given up. No plot whatsoever in this part, really.

Title: Grace
Pairing: Oz/Xander
Rating: this chapter, hard R or maybe NC-17, who knows. There is something resembling sex.
Warnings: none, really. Post-Chosen, no planned mention of AtS season 5
Chapters 1-12: here
ETA: not beta'ed. Many thanks to moosesal, entrenous88 and rubywisp for their relentless encouragement. *smooch*

Previously: At that, Xander cleared his throat and went for broke. "I know we're in mortal danger and all, but I would feel a lot better if you kissed me. Or, you know, we kissed." He felt like an idiot. But it was true, he'd been a jangle of nerves since the first night and every time the tension started to ease, something happened to bring it back with a vengeance. In Oregon, at least, the only time the world felt right was when they were touching. And more than touching. That was even better.

He felt rather than heard Oz's chuckle, but for a change, it didn't make him cringe because there was affection, he could sense it. Xander smiled, again like an idiot but he didn't so much care now, as Oz stood up to lean against the table and pull him in for a kiss that wiped his mind clear of danger and filled it with heat and possibilities. As their tongues met eagerly and the bitter taste of coffee melted into sweetness, Xander got the idea that this wasn't going to be a quick, semi-drugged grope. And considering how good that had been...wolf research could wait a few minutes. Or hours.
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One minute they were in the kitchen, the next he had Oz up against the door of the main bedroom, kissing him until they were both out of breath. He stopped his clumsy attempts at removing Oz's clothes to wonder how they got there, and the pause was long enough for Xander's brain to override his hormones and ask a question.

"You're not in pain, too much, for this?" he inquired muzzily as he gently stroked tender ribs. He wasn't sure he was making sense what with all the touching. Not sure what he had in mind either, he was just certain he didn't want Oz to hurt.

"Heal quicker than most. We're careful, be fine," Oz gasped as he spread his hands over Xander's bare back and pulled him in tighter.

"Good. Don't wanna stop," Xander mumbled into Oz's neck, licking a spot behind the ear that tasted so sweet he couldn't get enough. "Don't know what I'm doing though. Kinda new to the whole guy thing." He was embarrassed to admit it, but he hadn't had a chance to buy that manual yet, and it seemed better to be upfront about this deficiency.

"Show you everything, Xander. Whatever you can handle."

The need in Oz's voice erased any lingering doubts, and Xander shivered violently, the movement pushing his hips forward. There was moaning as their cocks brushed, and what was the reason he'd dated girls again? He couldn't remember. Breasts nice, Oz better.

Kissing with new enthusiasm, Xander smiled on the inside as he finally got that pesky shirt out of the way. He'd had to rip it, but could really care less, as the smaller man seemed to enjoy the display of strength and now he had more skin to explore. Oz was so smooth and warm, with a light dusting of pale hair in all the right places, and muscles that responded to every caress.

Xander was heedless of the loss of his own shirt, which he thought might have been missing for a while now. He was only aware of the man in his arms, soft hitches of breath that were what he needed to live. Slowly he backed up, knowing the bed was there somewhere, and when his legs hit the mattress Xander sat down and put his hands on Oz's narrow hips. All he wanted was to see that cock again, this time taste it, and learn the werewolf's secrets, each one, over and over.

"Xander," pleaded a low voice above him, and he leaned forward, brushing his cheek against the hardness he could feel straining behind loose denim. He undid buttons, mouthing each bit of black silk as it was exposed, reveling in the fresh scent of soap and something else that was pure Oz. Hands were on his shoulders now, kneading and pressing almost too hard but not quite. It made him *feel*, brought things into focus and it wasn't long before he was pushing down on Oz's jeans and boxers. Xander breathed out heavily as he took in the proud erection on display, wanting to taste it more than any piece of chocolate he'd ever had, but before he could Oz knelt in front of him.

"Need to see you," Oz said, pushing Xander back so he was leaning on his hands, legs spread and hips lifted. Sweatpants were gone in a flash, and then he was naked. Naked with Oz, but before he could process any further, there was wet heat, his cock sliding easily into that mouth, the one that said so little but had the power of a thousand words.

Xander arched his back, realizing on some level that most of the sounds he heard were coming from him, moans of want and need. He wanted to touch Oz in return, share this place, but couldn't find a muscle in his body willing to pull away from lips and tongue, or the small hand rolling his balls so perfectly. The visual was almost too much, watching Oz's head move, skin damp with sweat and pre-come, and he could feel an orgasm building, pounding with his heartbeat.

Through a fog of desire Xander knew he wanted to give some kind of warning, and put all his weight on one hand, freeing the other to rest on Oz's head. But instead of pulling away Oz gave a grunt of encouragement, and suddenly Xander knew he was *fucking* Oz's mouth, thrusting his hips and being welcomed until the world fell away. There was nothing but pleasure for endless moments, he felt like Oz had taken him in whole, he was safe and losing years of tension and uncertainty. As the feeling slowly faded, Xander gave in to gravity and slid back onto the bed, head spinning and body still shuddering as Oz continued tending to his softening cock.

"Com'ere," he managed to say, tugging gently at Oz's hair. That beautiful face appeared in his hazy vision, smiling and looking mussed and Xander could hardly believe he'd had anything to do with that radiance. Pulled him down for a kiss, tasted himself, bittersweet and layered with the now familiar Oz flavor of cinnamon.

"Mmmmmm," Xander hummed, stroking anything he could reach, and he felt Oz smile against his lips. "Was amazing, tha..."

"Don't thank me, Xander," Oz cut him off. "It was my pleasure." There was the rumbling voice again, that
vibrated something deep inside his soul, and even though he couldn't quite grasp why he knew Oz meant every precious word.

The insistent brush of an erection against his hip reminded him that his initial exploration had been not-so-rudely interrupted. After a minimum of fuss, Oz was propped against the headboard with some pillows and Xander was once more at eye-level with that amazing cock. A tentative lick to the head received a groan he recognized as good, so he licked again, this time along the underside of the shaft, and looked up to see if he was doing it right.

"Whatever you want to do, Xander," Oz whispered. So he went back to it, because the list of things he wanted to do was very, very long.

This was like kissing Oz only more, more intense and alive, Xander thought as he rolled his tongue over the slit, reveling in the reaction to every movement he made. Tentatively he touched Oz lower, letting his fingers get familiar with the softly fuzzed sack that was obviously very sensitive. Xander wanted so much to return the gift he had been given, and desperately wanted to know what it would feel like for Oz to fuck *his* mouth. He dropped his jaw, trying to take it all in, and hummed with pleasure when he was moderately successful. The vibration caused Oz to shift restlessly underneath him, stroke Xander's hair a little faster and it was perfect. Oz's thrusts were fairly shallow this way so Xander was happy instead to concentrate on sucking harder, learning what made Oz moan and doing it over and over again, as his own cock twitched with renewed interest. God, he'd had no idea how much this would turn him on, that Oz's arousal would be so powerful.

Oz's hands fell away and gripped the sheets. Murmurs peppered with endearments and curses and other words Xander didn't recognize washed over him, but he didn't care. He was going to bring his wolf over the edge any second and felt himself jerk in response when Oz's come hit the roof of his mouth and his name, never so beautiful, echoed in the bedroom. Warmth cascaded down his throat and Xander swallowed convulsively, determined to take everything he could.

Listening to their breathing slow, he finally stopped licking and rested his head on Oz's thigh. Contentment spread through him, bringing color where there was only grey, and he couldn't help but smile a little at the idea. Oz was only the most colorful person he'd ever known, it was just right that he would be the one to kick-start Xander back into the paint-by-numbers world. As they lay there together, words not wanted or needed, Xander knew he'd made a good choice by staying. It might hurt, and it might be messy -- there were still wolf and teenager issues to deal with, after all -- but it felt good. Good to connect with Oz, good to finally relax in his own skin, good to know he meant something to this man who was slowly but surely bringing him back to life.

The doorbell rang, unpleasantly breaking their comfortable silence, and he felt the body next to his tense immediately. So much for the afterglow. Xander seriously considered the idea that he was destined to never catch a break.

"Expecting anyone?" he asked, raising himself on an elbow to look at Oz, who had once more donned his blank face.

"No. Ignore it."

And they did, but then the unmistakable sound of glass breaking had them both out of bed in an instant.

Grace, chapter 13 (fic post)

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